jdinnis
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I have never in my whole life ever..... (screw Shag'em over)Hey guys,
Making my first appearence on the forum, bout time I know but at least I made it in the end.
I know how you guys must be missing hearing me and Shag'em stitch each other up over and over and over and over again in 'I have never' so I thought that we could have a new topic all about Shag'em and his funny ways.
Lets see how many pages we can fill of diry on the Welsh man!!
Catalogue
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jdinnis
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I have never in my whole life ever been sick in the Crown during sesh!!!
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jdinnis
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I have never in my whole life ever brought a gal back to my flat and had the fire alarm go off whilst I was getting up to no good!!
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jdinnis
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I have never in my whole life ever had a female fresher walk me home because I was to drunk to make it back on my own!!
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jdinnis
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I have never ever dated a gal who I later saw on a porno channel!!
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Andy
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Lets get the easy ones out of the way early on:
I have never been welsh! (fortunately)
I have never passed out in a gutter in Embrun.
I have never been beaten in 'Hot or Not' competition by a gay times model!
...
Andy
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stepheneagles
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I have never owned a little pot to put my toes nail clippings in
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stepheneagles
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I have never owned a sleeping bag that my nan 'built' for me
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jdinnis
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I have never lost a hot to not challange by only getting 5.3 as my score!!
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jdinnis
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I have never ever gone to sleep with chocolate on my chest so that I could lick it up when its melted in the morning!!
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jdinnis
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I have never brought a gal back to my flat for a casual shag (last Monday) but couldnt get little Jonhson up!! (New sesh name - 'Mr Floppy')
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Siôn
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lol
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stepheneagles
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what a fun thread 
x
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Shorty McChatty
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I have never had stiffy in the morning, having slept the night in a tent with Stevo and Catalogue.
...actually, considering your "special" relationships with these two, it's actually not that suprising!
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Siôn
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well qmy if u woke up next to steve I bet u would feel quite turned on as well
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Shorty McChatty
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siônny I have woken up with stevo a fair few times, and I have to say I'm obviously not gettin quite the same feelings as you mate!
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stepheneagles
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its nothing to be ashamed of sion - you were sharing a tent with me AND catalogue.
it was a very special night
x
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Shorty McChatty
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and you have a big willie!
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J-Ro
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| jdinnis wrote: | | I have never in my whole life ever been sick in the Crown during sesh!!! |
just noticed that joe said this.
you no what that means.........
CHALLENGE!!!!!!!
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Andy
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| J-Ro wrote: | | CHALLENGE!!!!!!! |
J, I hope that this is rectified no later than the next sesh. I remember in the Alps when Lu said something along the lines of "I have never been sick through drinking". I beleive it took us all of half a day to rectify this!
Andy
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jdinnis
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I did take the challenge up guys but sad to say I failed. Never chucked up in the crown, however the guild is a different case!!
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Anne-Marie
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I have never gone off for a half hour "Sleep" whilst the rest of the kayakers were seshing!
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Anne-Marie
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I have never chickened out of going down part of a river when a two freshers did it!
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Andy
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"I have never owned, or fantasised about, porn containing pictures like this:"
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jdinnis
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Wow what a stunner ai shag 'em. Thats gotta half your wanking time with material like that.
But Andy it does worry me that you own that picture. Hope we dont have a second kayak member with secret sheep fetish!!
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jdinnis
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I have never been high fived by a sweaty cock hand!!
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jdinnis
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I have never gone through 19 years of my life not knowing: -
1) How to cook rice
2) What a 'semi' is
3) What an 'Adams Apple' is!!
Studip Welsh!!
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Andy
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"I have never had to be taught how to wet shave whilst on tour in the Alps"
Andy
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jdinnis
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I have never looked at the picture of Anne-Marie from freakers and said "man she is looking so hot, if I hadn't already just had a wank I would now!!"
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Siôn
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memories, it was a gd pic u only had a small part of the back of her head in it
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Anne-Marie
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Oi! Just wait till Wales next weekend Sionny boy - you may take several swims if you're not careful! A bit like last wales weekend actually!
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Siôn
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ahem as I recall I swam just once and u swam five times? hmmm?
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Andy
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But Siôn, you have been paddling for over a year now! How many times did you swim on the Wales weekend last year? I know - you were just showing some appreciation for the fact that we were just paddling in Wales, and thought you would have a closer inspection of the river multiple times!
Andy
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Siôn
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multiple swims implies more than ONE swim andy!
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jdinnis
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I have never spewed Spag bol all over the walls/floor/ceiling/lights etc etc but missed the toilet on a wales weekend!
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jdinnis
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I have never played chess during a sesh! You loser!!!!!
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jdinnis
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I have never been asolutely shit at the Anne-Marie game!!!
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Siôn
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well chess beats ur compnay joe and as I recall I made less mistakes than u in that game named after a tit
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jdinnis
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| Siôn wrote: | | and as I recall I made less mistakes than u in that game |
Yes Sion of course you did, thats why I was the one wiv my head down the toilet chucking up everywhere!!
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jdinnis
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Right this one is going to be a classic from now on!!
I have never in my whole life ever had a piss in a pint glass under the table during sesh because the lovely chair wouldnt allow him to leave to go to the toilet!!!
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jdinnis
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I have never thought it would be a good idea to shave when I got back from a night out on the town, then woke up wiv blood all over my pillow and a lot of cuts on my face without knowing why!!
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pittende
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omg sion! wish I was in kayak sesh last nite!!!! Emma xxx
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jdinnis
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I have never not known the name of a girl that I was planning on taking back home so used this line, "look how funny my ID picture is of me when I had short hair, now let me see you ID!!"
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Anne-Marie
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I have never stuck sweets up my arse crack and then eaten them!
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Anne-Marie
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I have never worn nipple tassels!!!
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jdinnis
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I have never made a girl cry when I told her that we pulled each other the previous night when she was drunk!!
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Siôn
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ahem ok come on now joseph u know that thats completely twisted the truth
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nickg_44
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I have never ever in my whole life ever, asked catalogue if two minute wanks were normal.
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pittende
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I have never in my whole life ever... mistaken a girls "heavy breathing" whilst sleeping to be sex noises.
- what does this say about sions sex life???? xxxx
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nickg_44
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gutted! hahaha! whos "heavy breathing" was this?
nick x
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J-Ro
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I have never at the age of 19, had to be told what being "on the blob" was..
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Andy
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| J-Ro wrote: | | I have never at the age of 19, had to be told what being "on the blob" was.. |
And had my mum used as an example when it was being explained to me!
Andy
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pittende
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That may have been my "heavy breathing" xxx
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J-Ro
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| Andy wrote: | | J-Ro wrote: | | I have never at the age of 19, had to be told what being "on the blob" was.. |
And had my mum used as an example when it was being explained to me!
Andy |
ahhh mum bashing. a truly interlectual pastime. I love it.
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jdinnis
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I have never after being told sooooooo many times over the year about how to use the grill, then gone and closed the grill whilst it was on and caused a fire in the kitchen and had to use the fire extinguisher to put it out.
I have also never failed to realise you need to put out the pin on the fire extinguisher before it would work whilst trying to put out a fire!!
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Anne-Marie
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I have never failed to make it on a night out because I was inacapacitated in bed by 9:15! Poor Form!
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